Retro Role Cast
"Serious roleplaying games played by deeply unserious people."
We are a tabletop roleplaying actual play podcast featuring games that remind us of our gaming roots! We play in person with real math rocks! We love gritty, high action dark settings with nuance, but aren't too far away from our bitter, cynical, yet still lovable selves at all times!
Currently: Going way back to many of our players' 1e roots by playing the new third edition of OSRIC (pdf available free on DrivethruRPG, fantastic hard copies available through Mythmere Games) with a home cooked mini (?) campaign in the World known as Greyhawk in the classic era. follow along as the PCs navigate the dangerous environments and tricky politics of the Duchy of Tenh/Theocracy of the Pale border region!
In season one we played Low Fantasy Gaming by Pickpocket Press, Its sequel game Tales of Argosa is released, available, and comes highly recommended by all of us, stop by Pickpocket Games on the web for more info!
Season two saw a transition to a modified Version of Old School Essentials (Advanced) by Gavin Norman, one of many retro offshoots of the world's most popular role playing game. We borrow rules and content from many sources, but with Old School Essentials we used (in no particular order), Old School Feats by Eric Diaz, Into The Wyrd and Wild by Charles Furgeson-Avery, Into the Wild by Todd Leback, The Axian Library by Guiseppe Rotondo, and the Monster Overhaul by Skerples, amongst other sources.
With the close of Season 2 and the addition of two new Retro Role Casters we have moved to a more episodic format for Season 3. We are referring to seasons 1 and 2 as our Zero Level Funnel of Podcasting.
Season three and into the first part of Season four the four OG hosts took turns GM-ing one shots, Three Shadowdark adventures because we love Kelsey's fantastic Old meets New game, Mothership to satisfy our love of the Alien Movies and a Halloween special using the Call of Cthulhu rules.
Logo Art: Olivia G, Background Art: Bob Greyvenstein. Some artwork © Grim Press, used with permission. All rights reserved.
Retro Role Cast
Shadowdark! The Well of Shune Ep. 2
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The slow progress of the wagon train leaves members of the company feeling mutinous... A halfling becomes a cat toy... A novel use of pickpocketing... and we devote slightly more time than is necessary to pondering the luminescence and celestial position of a waning crescent moon...
#ad&d #Shadowdark #OSR #ttrpg #actualplay #rpg #Dnd #oldschoolrpg
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This week on Retro Rollcast. Is there enough moonlight to walk by a little bit at least? There's a waning crescent moon out there, so there's some moonlight, not a ton. So waning crescent means it's up at this time of day, actually. It's it wouldn't come out until like two or three in the morning. So yes, there would be light. Did I just man has moon knowledge?
SPEAKER_03I love how we're all just taking that as fact.
SPEAKER_04Sounds great to me. I'm gonna roll with it as something in here for all to be fair.
SPEAKER_02Waxing and waning simply means wait, is it a waxing or waning? It's waning. Right.
SPEAKER_01So check this out. The moon, full moon comes up at 6 p.m. The later in the time period of the moon goes, it'll come up at 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13. Like so if you're in the wax.
SPEAKER_02Which by the way is completely dependent on what part of the planet you're on.
SPEAKER_01It is. Look, the full moon is only three days off, no matter where you're on the planet. A full moon here is no different, like three days from now than somewhere else on the planet. It's not like it's completely opposite, right?
SPEAKER_02So it would I looked it up. So then at the end of the evening, so like two or three in the morning is when the waxing crescent moon actually comes out. Makes sense. And then that's why you can't see it in the middle of the day. Unless you're on the opposite side of the planet. No, it's just slightly off. Then it would be day.
SPEAKER_04So we do have a point. But it's still the same, it's still gonna show you the same thing. During your cycle, it's going to do the same thing. The moon is tidelocked to Earth. Right?
SPEAKER_01It's gonna be in the same phase for everybody. This makes a pond moon look like here. Looks like a wave impression.
SPEAKER_00Okay, leave your comments. I hate you guys.
SPEAKER_02When we last left our heroes, the sun was setting. We're eating some moose. They were settling into a new camp and cooking up some moose for dinner. So who has first watch? That's me now. We shuffled the watches a bit. So Hjalmar. Dinner is done. People are packing up, preparing for the evening. Anyone want to do anything in particular? No, I don't think I. I scratch myself. Yeah? Give me a dex check. Can't reach it. Crit fail. You rip it off.
SPEAKER_00Either can't reach it or injury it.
SPEAKER_04I mean, my DEX is a seven. Like I said. We've gone at length about not rolling for things that you should just be able to do. And I've been doing that for a long time. But this is way more fun.
SPEAKER_02I should have advantage. But a critical failure would be so much more entertaining.
SPEAKER_04Well, I wouldn't have made anything other than an easy check.
SPEAKER_02Mm-hmm. Okay. Well, nothing happens. This is weird. You successfully ready to fuck out. Scratch was unsatisfying. Right.
SPEAKER_04It may just dwell on what was just an offhand remark.
SPEAKER_03Yeah.
SPEAKER_02Now it's a thing. Alright, so Kelmar, the sun goes down, people start filtering out to their normal sleeping arrangements. Anything in particular you want to do on your watch or just passing the time? Pass time, walk them perimeter. Alright. Your watch passes uneventfully. It's getting pretty cold though.
SPEAKER_03Kick the fire up and then I'll wake up my good friend.
SPEAKER_02Where do you guys sleep like under a wagon? Are you sleeping near the fire? What are you doing? What is your typical in a wagon? Are the bat are the wagons covered? Yeah. Yeah, I'm sleeping in a wagon on top of a pile of like flour and whatever. I think that's what most people are doing, although it's warmer to sleep by the fire. So some people do bed down there.
unknownYeah.
SPEAKER_02I feel safer. Right, that's natural human. Just get me in a box. I feel better in a box. Right. Give me a cave, right? Give me something to crawl into.
SPEAKER_04Well, that would be uh exaggerated in my case because I'm a dwarf. Right. You need like extra deep. So I would be under the wagon.
SPEAKER_02So you have last watch. Who has midwatch now? I have midwatch now. I sleep in wagon eight. I almost said with Eloth, the driver, but I don't sleep with Eloth because I know that will turn into a thing if I say something like that. It's too late, you knew there was going to be some implications there if we said it's out in the open circuit.
SPEAKER_01We sleep in all the wagon. But we circle the wagons, right? So they're not really in any particular anymore. You hear that? He's talking real fast.
SPEAKER_00And the fire's in the center. It never happened. Look, circles.
SPEAKER_02When camp gets ambushed, I need to know the shape of the camp. So we find a fire detail and eight wagons around notice.
SPEAKER_04He's a tactical thief.
SPEAKER_01And our wagons are pulled by oxen horses, like shaggy horses, the Clydesdale Shaggy horses. Shaggy mountain horses. Shaggy cows. And this is the twelfth day of our eighth day. So every day I will be asking Halvard. So much longer. Right. Why aren't we there? We're almost four days overdue, Halvard. Anyway, but I make my normal watch rounds. I tend the fire when it gets low. I skulk around. And occasionally, because I'm walking around, I walk and pause at the cupboard wagon of the mystery wagon and just give a listen for 10 minutes at a time.
SPEAKER_02Make sure there's no voodoo magics going on in there. We hate voodoo. Or curses or the wagons shaking rhythmically or whatever happens to be going on during the wagon.
SPEAKER_04Everything weird.
SPEAKER_01Well, folks, these are there's information in that, right? That tells me there's two people in there. It tells me they could be anything. Could be three. But or more. See, now you're making it weird. So, but you see my point, right? So I just want to try and get any kind of information about that wagon.
SPEAKER_02Because it's been 12 days about it. Beating a dead moose. Is that what you're saying?
SPEAKER_01Beating a dead moose.
SPEAKER_02Rodney. Yeah, what? Move on, brother. What?
SPEAKER_04Well, he's listening.
SPEAKER_02Let's resolve that. Yes. Well, either there's anything to hear.
SPEAKER_00Yeah, I think there's a special friend in that wagon.
SPEAKER_02And it's not just during like, I'm not just listening once. I listen constantly. Constantly for that inside and out. Because that's stock. That's the mystery of what's going on inside the caravan as well as what's out there in the giant world. You have certainly gleaned that there is a live thing inside that wagon. There's definitely something moving. It's not a particularly rhythmic or predictable movement.
unknownOkay.
SPEAKER_02But there is definitely something in there alive. There is typically smoke that comes from the wagon at night. Like they've got a small stove or something in there. Yeah, well. And that's really about all you get out of it. Yeah. No strange, like sulfury smells or anything like that. No. Okay. Normal caravan, horses, smoke. Alright. Just letting you know I pay extra attention to that while I do my skulking around the rest of the well.
SPEAKER_04You mentioned the wagons are circled. Has there been any attempts by the caravan master or his sidekick to double the defenses on that particular wagon or have that inside the circle at all? Not at all. Okay. So they're just the opposite. Same as everybody else.
SPEAKER_01Alright, well, when my shift is up, if if uneventful, I go wake up, throll. It's your turn.
SPEAKER_04It's me. I'll get up, Letty.
SPEAKER_01I kick him extra. I don't, in fact, I don't let him keep going.
SPEAKER_02I'm standing there nudging with my toe until he's on his feet. I'm up. Are you literally standing up right now? It's hard to tell sometimes. I'm up. Fine. So you two emerge from the wagon that you've been kicking the dwarf in and notice it's starting to snow. This is why we don't sleep outside. The sky's got that solid gray look about it. Well, I can't see the sky at all. It's freaking dark out.
SPEAKER_04It's the best. Alright, so uh stone over your head, that's the best. Dark deep in the womb of the earth.
SPEAKER_02Alright, it's starting to get a little weirder, Thrall. The Earth Mother. Thrall needs to meet.
SPEAKER_04You just woke me up, Laddie. What do you want?
SPEAKER_02I don't want to hear about your crazy dwarf dreams of being inside Mother Earth.
SPEAKER_04Well then go away. Alright, fine.
SPEAKER_02Wake me up if you need me. Alright, so you head to bed. Alright, where are you standing watch? Are you going by the fire? Walking a perimeter?
SPEAKER_04I'm gonna walk around on the inside of the of the wagons. On the inside of the wagons. Inside the circle. Okay. Inside the circle. Alright. I'm gonna peer out, that sort of thing. Is it a moon? You can't see anything. Okay, it's it's completely dark.
SPEAKER_02It is snowing. The sky is a solid gray plane. It's just cloud cover, snow. It's actually starting to snow pretty good. Things are starting to accumulate.
SPEAKER_04Well, if we can't see them, they can't see us. So we're good.
SPEAKER_02Speaking of which, you do think you see some movement out in the snow, but you can't tell if it's really there or if it's just the snow falling. Maybe some shadows. Not sure.
SPEAKER_04And these two haven't been doing watch this entire trip. No. Studying.
SPEAKER_02That's bullshit. The priest has to pray. The mage has to study.
SPEAKER_04But they gotta they've gotta be getting up soon to do those things, right? I'm in the last watch.
SPEAKER_02Unless they did it at night.
unknownYeah.
SPEAKER_00We do it during first watch.
SPEAKER_02They haven't cast any spells. Or I'm a bad priest and I don't know. You don't know that. Okay, well, you know what I mean. Yeah, you don't know anything.
SPEAKER_03I'm sleeping. I just love how our plan of attack page is completely blank. I just was filled up with notes with curses and names and stuff. Our game in a nutshell.
SPEAKER_04Okay, well, uh in the direction in the direction that I think I see something. I'm going to go out like in and hang out in the middle between two carts. Okay. In that direction, I'm just gonna peer out. I'm gonna let my eyes get used to the darkness a bit. I'm not gonna light a torch or anything. I'm just gonna just the fire behind you. Keep an eye on that particular and see if I hear or see anything at all.
SPEAKER_02Okay. Time passes, the snow continues to pile up. Maybe. Nothing concrete, nothing appears. It could be shadows from the fire. Hard to say.
SPEAKER_04Probably just the wind. Is it lightning lightning in the sky at all? Not yet. Like on a horizon or anything? Okay.
SPEAKER_02No. You do you have heard distant wolf pack kind of noises, but that's pretty constant in this part.
SPEAKER_04Yeah.
SPEAKER_02And the sun begins to rise. Snow starts to taper off a little bit. Sun's coming up, getting a little warmer.
SPEAKER_04Sun. Alright. As it gets a little bit light, I'm gonna wake up one of these two.
SPEAKER_02Okay.
SPEAKER_04Which one? Just to finish the watch. And if there's a little bit of light, I'm gonna go out and see if there's any tracks or anything in the snow. Any depressions in the snow in that direction. I'm not gonna go far. Unless it That direction is west off the trail. So west off the trail. I'm just like 20 yards or so to see if there's anything there. I'm gonna have well I'm gonna wake up Glam. Do you have a lot of experience tracking none at all? No? Okay. Footprints in the snow, damn easy. I uh I hammer metal and I make it different shapes.
SPEAKER_02Fair enough. So you march out and I don't there might be tracks there, but it's been snowing pretty heavily. Okay. So maybe those are s pattern of depressions that were snowed over.
SPEAKER_04Okay.
SPEAKER_02Going around the wagon train. But it's impossible to really tell what or how many or anything like that. Alright. And everybody's crawling out, you see Stiger and Halvard pouring over a map.
SPEAKER_04Alright, so I'm gonna go over to Stiger and Halvard. I'm just gonna let 'em know that I didn't see anything that concerned me necessarily, but there may have been movement around the campsite on the third watch. Where? West off the trail. Nothing showed up. I didn't see anything concrete. Just a felt.
SPEAKER_02Probably wolves. Checking this out. Follow the blood trail, perhaps. I don't know.
SPEAKER_04We didn't bring it here.
SPEAKER_02You never know.
SPEAKER_04No, we know. We packed up with a moose.
SPEAKER_02Never mind. Alright, so everybody starts breaking out. The snow has dropped a solid eight to ten inches.
SPEAKER_01What?
SPEAKER_02It snowed a lot overnight. So it's tapering off. It's very bright. Everything's solid white. So we're not going any fucking wear today. Your wagons have pretty big wheels. They're made for this. They can probably move through the snow. It'll just be slow.
SPEAKER_00The word probably slower than the snow. So slow.
SPEAKER_02Probably fine. Halvard. Day 13. This is 65 gold pieces. I'm starting to feel like I should get some of that money right now. Well, I would give it to you if I had it, but it's not here. Sorry, what? It's at our destination. Well, why aren't we there yet? Because it's no. Every day you pour over that map.
SPEAKER_01I'm beginning to think you don't know where we are. I know where we are. We're right here. On the map?
SPEAKER_02Is that on the map? Are you showing me on a map? No, he's not showing you the map. Well, why show me the map, Halberd?
SPEAKER_04Show us on the map where we are and where Miro's Rest is.
SPEAKER_02We're 13 days into an eight-day trip. This is not what we signed up for. I did not sign up the winter in Miro's Rest. You signed up to take this caravan to Miro's Rest. That's where we're going. Are you sure? So you've never heard of caravans taking longer than normal because of weather? Not a thing? Not on caravans we've worked before. Not double time. Well, I don't know what to tell you. Well, you could tell us how long it's going to take us to get to Miro's Rest. You shouldn't do when you're doing a podcast. Randomly playing with the springs on your mic stand might not be very ironic.
SPEAKER_03Yeah, I was just gonna say, wait a minute. Wait a fucking minute. Wait, right? Of all people to be fucking calling somebody out on that. Hey, throw. I'm jealous.
SPEAKER_02Honestly. What? You have my back. I got your back. What about you, Palmar? I snatched the map out of Halbert's hand. No, you don't. I'm sorry. I'm a thief, and I'm making an attempt to snatch the map from Halbert's hand. Halbert's not holding the map. Okay. Who's holding the map? Well, he and Stigir were looking at the map. Okay. As you walked up. All right. As soon as you got within range to see the map, it disappeared. They put it away. Alright. I snatch it from wherever they put it. And I don't care if they know. Okay. Give me an intelligence check to figure out where they put it. I mean, I was watching them, right? Well, okay. If somebody turns away from you. And somebody you're full of shit. If I rolled an 18, I got an intelligence of 15. All right. That's legit. So you saw a Stig ear tuck it into a pocket inside his coat. Alright. And then I remove it from his pocket. How? With my ability to pick pockets. Because I'm a thief. So okay.
SPEAKER_01I mean, I don't know if I need to specifically say I walk up and I pull it out of his pocket, but that's exactly what I'm doing.
SPEAKER_02So you're attempting to do it without his knowledge. I mean, I sneak in and once I don't care if he knows that I have it, I just don't want him to see me coming. Right. So you're attempting to do it without his knowledge.
SPEAKER_04Like I think what he's he's trying to use the element of surprise to take it.
SPEAKER_02But I don't care if he knows that I have it. Oh, okay. You know what I mean? Two big burly guys right to the city. Right. Because I already cleared it with my friends. So I believe they would call this an opposed role. No, I think don't I just get to make a chance to make my a pick pockets check at a difficulty level? Well, he knows you're there. I prepare QR. Right? Okay, that's fine. Right in front of him. All right. So if you try to grab something, I mean I failed horribly. But I did attempt to grab it. Okay. Give me that map, Halvard. He grabs your wrist as you reach for his pocket and says, No. I don't think you're being honest with us about something.
SPEAKER_04I unlimber the great axe. I I don't make any threatening gestures, but I just pull the extra.
SPEAKER_01We're 13 days into an eight-day trip. We have eight inches of snow on the ground. You keep looking at that map every morning.
SPEAKER_02We don't seem to be anywhere closer to our destination. What's going on? What's going on is we need some answers. The road is full of snow and mud, and the wagons can't go as fast as they could on a dry, uncovered road. And then about five minutes ago, I hear that you'll get your gold when we get there, but I see that was the deal. I see no there. There's no there yet. Because we're not there yet. Well, when are we going to get there? What do you not understand about how many wagon not go fast on snowy, muddy road?
SPEAKER_03How many days?
SPEAKER_02How many miles are we out? If you're reading the map, we still probab at this pace, we're probably six to eight days out. There we go. Wait. Right. We've Right. We're going to be 20 days into an eight-day eight-day.
SPEAKER_04This is an eight-day trek. On a nice We're eight days out, and we've gone 13. Right. And it just started snowing more. And it's then wagon goes slow because snow.
SPEAKER_02No, that's exactly what this is. I think you're lying. Why don't you show us on the map how long? We've all been in wagons. Where are you leading us, Hilmar? Well, to be clear, you've all been in wagons, and this is not abnormal. I'm starting to do that. This rate of travel is predictable for this weather conditions.
SPEAKER_04Right of the rate of the normal estimate.
SPEAKER_02Just about half, like below half speed. Well, I mean about half speed is normal for treacherous conditions.
SPEAKER_01Look, Halbert, there needs to be a trust relationship between employer and employees, and I'm happy to admit that our trust level getting to Miro's rest is not great.
SPEAKER_03This is this this is how caravan unions start.
SPEAKER_02Yeah, where's the HR rep? So we will continue, I guess, at this pace and rate until we get to Miro's rest. Yeah, that's the idea. We'll see.
SPEAKER_04And I did extra watches the other night, too.
SPEAKER_02Yeah, you don't get paid for watch. So by the time we get to Miro's rest, I will be owed 100 gold pieces. You'll be able to retire. And you'll have to because you'll be old. And we're not going to get any money out of the mead, because by the time we get there, Thrall will have drank it all. The money from the mead wouldn't be yours anyway.
SPEAKER_01Well, somehow or another, I see 500 gold pieces just for the guards, plus what all of our draw your drivers are making. Well, I mean, is there 500 gold pieces of product in your wagons at this point? Right? This is costing you three times as much as you had anticipated.
SPEAKER_02No one has felt the need to discuss the economics of this pension with the guards. Okay. They hired you saying, you bring big stick, you guard caravan gold. Here's your rate per day. We're going there. It should take this long. Go. All right. No one said we're going to make this much money. That was not in your discussion. All right. Go sit in wagon seven. If you, I mean.
SPEAKER_04Fine. Damn it.
SPEAKER_03Are you skulking?
SPEAKER_00I don't see how he's making any money on this trip.
SPEAKER_02Right. I go sit with Dagney in Wagon 7. And that's fine. Wait, what's the name? Dagney in Wagon 7. Where did you come up with that? I got them all off of the name chart in the curse of scroll number three.
SPEAKER_01I just went down the list and picked eight names off of that.
SPEAKER_02That has been my online game handle for like 20 years. Dagney? Yes. Fuck. The character I'm playing in an MMO right now has that name. Well, then I guess you know everything there is.
SPEAKER_04So in podcast lane, you know who to look up. Right? You can on his MMO of choice. I'm not saying anybody.
SPEAKER_02But I know what it is. All right. So so Dreck goes. Back and hangs out in wagon seven with with Dagny. I recommend these keep coming. Howard is watching you go and he's looking at you like you're a fucking idiot. And he keeps quiet for the rest of the game. He's got that look on his face like, where did we find these idiots? Holy shit. I mean, he does have a point. You chose us. The economics are all fucked left. Yeah. You ain't making a profit. Well, it's like any business venture. You weigh the risks. I'm glad you're not running my blacksmith shop. You take the risk, and if it doesn't pay off, it doesn't pay off.
SPEAKER_01But how do I get paid?
SPEAKER_04He's a little he's a little flighty, but he'll be alright. But seriously, we gotta get a move up.
SPEAKER_02Have you worked with him? Feel free to make these wagons go faster. I would love it.
SPEAKER_03Push. I've got an axe. Well, and if you don't shoot every random freaking moose you see, we might have a little more time.
SPEAKER_02Well, we're in the business of selling what? My time. Provisions to a town.
SPEAKER_00Moose provisions.
SPEAKER_03By the time we get there, they're all starved to death.
SPEAKER_02It'll be right and feed you guys something other than the stuff in the wagons.
SPEAKER_04I can tell you're a city man, but Miro's rest is in the mountains.
SPEAKER_02They can procure their own moose. Right. But what they can't procure are the foodstuffs in my wagon. What I can feed you with while we get there is moose. See where I'm going here.
SPEAKER_00Help me out with a moose. Moose again. It's going to be moose every day.
SPEAKER_03You said we were eating like kings.
SPEAKER_04You're king of the moose.
SPEAKER_02First eight days.
SPEAKER_04But anyway. I'm just talking to you right now to slow this down because I want to hear this again tomorrow morning.
SPEAKER_03Every morning. So he's got child support payments due. Come on. Leave him alone.
SPEAKER_02While this is happening, everybody is preparing the wagons to move out. And shaking their heads, I'm sure. And just be like everybody.
SPEAKER_00Eating some moose. Moose jerky again. Again. Meat and jerky.
SPEAKER_02It wouldn't be jerky, but no, you're right. It's frozen. But there are definitely salted moose jerky hanging inside wagons to dry.
SPEAKER_04We're still in moose steak territory right now. Right.
SPEAKER_02Moose loin. Yeah. Big chunk O moose over fire. Go.
SPEAKER_04Moose sausage and all that is in the future.
SPEAKER_02Yeah, we don't have the stuff to make sausage. That's in Miro's rest, eventually, or no. If we ever fucking get there. As you start the day, the wagons begin to move. You're starting to go uphill a bit. You can see a pass in the distance. Well, the whole trip has been uphill to some degree.
SPEAKER_05Okay.
SPEAKER_02The last few days have been going through a wetland kind of area. You're now coming out of that and up into a pass. Still very heavily wooded, still coniferous. The snow is ever present. Anyone have anything particular they want to do as we progress through the day?
SPEAKER_04What is there to do but trudge and bitch?
SPEAKER_02Complain. Yeah, piss and moan. I mean, that part we're going spot on. You are. Yeah. Very good at that.
SPEAKER_03We've got years of practice, about three or so.
SPEAKER_02Are we there yet? No, you're not there yet. So early in the day, you see, again, what looks like maybe Eagle Hawk something in the distance. It looks like it's heading your way and it's getting bigger. Of course it is. Much bigger. Thank God this is almost over. Very would we know what this thing is? Very you've heard tales of the rocks that live in these peaks. Giant birds of prey.
SPEAKER_04Yep.
SPEAKER_02The size of dragons.
SPEAKER_04Is it actually Rocktober? Rocktober?
SPEAKER_02It is not. It is more like uh Rockback. Rock Vember. Rock Vember, yeah. Okay. And you know, it it comes, you see it fly overhead, and it is enormous. The horses start to get a little nervous as the shadow passes.
SPEAKER_04But uh I'm gonna make a sarcastic remark to the caravan master about maybe we can eat that for our next 15 days.
SPEAKER_03Bring it down and we'll taste it. Why don't you shoot it?
SPEAKER_04Shoot. Why don't you sh why don't you go ahead and loose an arrow at that one with no following plan? You first. It's out of range anyway.
SPEAKER_02My hand axe doesn't go that high. No. But the rock sees the caravan, obviously, checks you out, and moves off. Or too scrawny. Right. If only it had a big fat moose to eat. Probably it's normal prey. It would not you know that a bird like that would probably see the horses and be like, that could be yummy.
SPEAKER_00We should drag the moose behind us and try to bring it down.
SPEAKER_01I'd like to see Halmar do a shield wall versus a moose or a that's next.
SPEAKER_02Bring it. Alright. No trouble, you just watch it for a while as you're moving. Yeah. It flies off. Hard not to stare at it. But it is amazing. Like it yeah, right. It is hard not to stare at it because it's just everybody seems to like to watch birds of prey, and it is a very big one. It's unnatural. Big. Don't like it.
SPEAKER_04Big. You'd think the halfling would be the one who's gonna be. And this is the second time it's been by.
SPEAKER_02Well, is it the same one? Who knows? Is there a pack? Well, we haven't gone far enough to get out of its territory if that was just one first one.
SPEAKER_04Maybe you can go steal an egg.
SPEAKER_03And then train it and ride it. I think a rock mount would be pretty awesome. Maybe even better than a moose. Maybe we could follow it to the room. Every animal we find, I want to try to make it my mount.
SPEAKER_04Yeah, he wants to eat it, you want to ride it. I heard every animal. I don't know what I'm talking about right now.
SPEAKER_02He wants I want to eat it, he wants to ride it. We're talking about moose, right?
SPEAKER_04Rock the rock everyone. Well, now we're talking about a rock, but derailed.
SPEAKER_02Are we?
SPEAKER_00So the rock group has passed.
SPEAKER_02Yes. So the day continues.
SPEAKER_00And he's rolling.
SPEAKER_02It means something's happening. No, not necessarily.
SPEAKER_00Yeah.
SPEAKER_02The result of the roll tells me if something's happening. We've played this film before. Alright, so the day passes without really any further excitement. Start to set up camp. Anyone have any particular actions they want to perform? I go talk to Halverd.
SPEAKER_03So Halverd, getting on day 14 here now.
SPEAKER_02How far we make it today? You're on your own on this one. Well, I just want to know how far we made it today. How far do we estimate we drove? Road. I guess about six miles. We we can turn around and see our previous campsite. Actually, because of the elevation change, you almost can. You can see back behind you, you can see down the valley.
SPEAKER_00We're see where you can.
SPEAKER_02I think probably about 20 miles visibility from this elevation. We're at a high pass, right? Yeah, you're moving up into a high pass, so you have a pretty good view behind you.
SPEAKER_01Okay.
SPEAKER_02You think you can almost see the sea. It's a clear day. Storm has passed. And you can see other things flying off in the distance. Like very far away. But yeah. Which direction? Natural activity. In the course of the day, probably all of them. There is wildlife, it is active, things are moving.
SPEAKER_04Okay.
SPEAKER_02Not unusual. Are there vultures circling Nero's rest? From what you've been told, that would be northwest of your position, and you don't see anything in particular in that direction.
SPEAKER_04Are we the only guards for this caravan?
SPEAKER_02The only hired guards, yes. What does that mean? Well, there's the driver. Yeah. It's maybe three, four miles. Like you're gonna go through it probably tomorrow.
SPEAKER_04Well, we might be doing our uh jobs as guards better if we scout ahead. As a group, we can go ahead and check out the pass. Because it's gonna be a choke point when we go through the pass. Nobody's up here to ambush us, no way.
SPEAKER_03They'd be waiting for one thing to come through. I mean, unless they knew we were coming.
SPEAKER_04We're guards, paranoia has to be our stuff.
SPEAKER_03Are you suggesting that I understand where you're coming from? The caravan guards handle the caravan while we're an advanced scout party.
SPEAKER_01The drivers guard the part, like they're all eight drivers Hagen, Ranga, Astrid, Kenute, Ulf, Ingolf, Dagny, and Elolf guard the their wagons in the camp while we scout a lot. I dig it. I think it's cool. I think you guys are right. I think Thrall is correct that if we go scout ahead, maybe we can see a better way through. We can see, look, maybe I'll have a more positive attitude.
SPEAKER_03And I say we do it just for that reason alone.
SPEAKER_02All right, so right now, I'm concerned, buddy. I will tell you. You're a little upset. You've got about two hours of daylight left. Hell man, I could make six miles in two hours. You basically you stop, start setting up camp a couple hours before nightfall. So you can uh at that point, is that when you want to scout ahead?
SPEAKER_04Well, are we doing this now or are we gonna do it first thing that we can do? Right out first light. I'm like, let's do it now. Of course.
SPEAKER_02What's the weather look like? It's very clear. Right. I mean, weather's clear now. A lot of visibility. It seems to be very uh mixed at night. And in the morning. Well, we could go in the morning. Look, I'm off for each other.
SPEAKER_04Well, here's the thing. We are guards, we have a responsibility no matter how shitty the And if they get ambushed tonight after we leave, we're not leaving we're not walking around. That's what you want to do.
SPEAKER_01No, look, we walk an hour ahead and then we'll do it in the morning. All right? Yeah. We'll do it in the morning. We'll mark the trees or whatever. Not that Stigir couldn't follow the trail. I'm sure we'll all be able to see it. Right. Let's do it in the morning.
SPEAKER_02Do it in the morning. I agree. Yeah. And I promise not to ask in the morning how many days we have left.
SPEAKER_00From our You will.
SPEAKER_02From our brain brain trust.
SPEAKER_03From the brain trust. This is a smart side of the table.
SPEAKER_04It is. The priest and the wizard. What do you feel about the uh the fighter and stealing uh stuff types have spoken? What do you feel about the plan?
SPEAKER_03Yeah, the jocks want to go. What do the nerds want to do?
SPEAKER_02Eric, roll two D ten and tell me the number. 2D10. Odd. It's a 9d6. So a 9 and 2d 10. 9 and 6. So you're heading out as soon as the wagon train stops. No, we're going to wait till tomorrow morning. Wait till the morning. First light. So you're going to try to arrange ahead of the wagon. Actually, right before first light, to be honest with you.
SPEAKER_04We should get a really early start.
SPEAKER_02Yeah. Okay.
SPEAKER_04And we're going to tell the caravan leadership what we are doing. Halvard. He approves. Halvard. We are leaving. Well, I we were telling him. I wasn't asking him. Right. Right, no. But yeah. Okay.
SPEAKER_03We think the battle. That sounds good.
SPEAKER_02Is the most dangerous spot, and we're going to go make sure it's secure. We'll keep Stigger here in case something actually happens. Alright, so uh who's on first watch?
unknownOh watches.
SPEAKER_01That's me. Yeah, I think we're Almar. I look, I think we should add these guys, Cyril and Thrall Glem. They need to do watches too. We can't have nothing against Thrall guys, but you know.
SPEAKER_03He falls asleep a lot.
SPEAKER_02He's not the most reliable on watches. Are you trying to modify the contract?
SPEAKER_04Oh, the teacher has become the student. Now you're looking for more.
SPEAKER_03Listen, little one, you gotta pull your weight. I know it's not a lot of weight, but you still gotta pull it.
SPEAKER_02I mean, he did weight in against the moose. Your contract is not with me. Your contract is with the man paying you five gold.
SPEAKER_00You're trying to find me more work to do.
SPEAKER_02I'm trying to find you any work to do. Just something.
SPEAKER_01Anything at all.
SPEAKER_02You've done more damage to a moose. Not than me. I'm the one who killed that moose. That's true. You stuck it with a sword as it ran past you.
SPEAKER_00I killed the moose. I'm the only one that risked anything in front of the moose.
SPEAKER_02The priest of nature killed the moose. Not that it matters. You little one, you need to pull your weight. I'll take a watch. That's not a lot of weight. Thank you. I said that. 15 minutes and 15 minutes claim.
SPEAKER_00I can do that. I will watch it. I will take whatever watches you need to do. I will watch the entire night if I have to.
SPEAKER_02Oh, that's okay. 24-7. Who's on first watch? Yalmar. Yalmar? I'll go with him. It's a nice night. Beautiful night. Still clear, very cold. We'll do that. Moonlight. Yeah. Okay. Yeah, it is a roll. And there's still snow on the ground. It is a waning crescent moon. So yeah. Beautiful night, actually. Fresh snow. The world is white. So is the snow and clean. Marred simply by the tracks of the wagons coming up the trail. And your watch passes with little event.
unknownOkay.
SPEAKER_02Who are you waking? Uh you're talking to Romar?
SPEAKER_01Mm-hmm.
SPEAKER_02Okay. I'm waking up direct. Alright. I do my same routine. Pathing.
SPEAKER_01Yeah, and I step quietly through the snow. Listen. Skulk through the snow. Listen, I listen to the uh the fifth the strange whatever you want to call it, caravan wagon.
SPEAKER_02The strange wagon. You're lurking around that wagon. I'm skulking around it from time from time to time. So you're spending more time there than anywhere else.
SPEAKER_01Yeah, I mean I'm focused as much on the wagon as I am on the outside.
SPEAKER_02Okay.
SPEAKER_01Just to hear and catch any glimpse or clue of whatever this strange wagon is that is perfectly okay with us taking three times as long to get from one place to another.
SPEAKER_02And they haven't come out and complained once. I think they're the real financiers. It is day 15. Right. Okay. That's there's some weird stuff.
SPEAKER_01And then when mine is up, I don't I get I get Glem up because I believe that he would be reliable enough to not get trashed over the rest of the night.
SPEAKER_00Yeah, I don't drink.
SPEAKER_02Alright, I don't trust him. All right.
SPEAKER_00Never trust someone who doesn't drink.
SPEAKER_02Nothing new in Wagonville. Okay. You wake up Glem. Hey. Alright. Give it about two hours and wake up Thrall. Give him three kicks. Okay. He doesn't wake up really easily. So about an hour into your watch.
SPEAKER_00I knew it.
SPEAKER_02You hear I ignore it. A rumble.
SPEAKER_00A rumble. A rumbling sound. No.
SPEAKER_02Go get some more memory. It's one of those things that you feel more than hear.
SPEAKER_00Feel the rumble.
SPEAKER_02Oh. But there's nothing obvious to you of why there's a rumble.
SPEAKER_00Right. That's an avalanche.
SPEAKER_02Safe to assume.
SPEAKER_00Do I see an avalanche if I look?
SPEAKER_02Nothing in the peaks you can see from where you are.
SPEAKER_00Where's the look up first? Gamers don't look up. Can I tell where the rumbling is coming from?
SPEAKER_02Or is it probably northern everywhere? Is it getting louder?
SPEAKER_00Near the pass?
SPEAKER_02You're sleeping. In that direction is seems that way. Are we sure it's not thrall snoring?
SPEAKER_00Does the rumble continue? Increase? No, it does.
SPEAKER_02It builds crescendos and then stops. Stops.
SPEAKER_00Alright, then I won't alert anyone at this point in time.
SPEAKER_03Okay. It's best safest approach.
SPEAKER_00Just ignore it.
SPEAKER_03Let us get our sleep. It's probably fine.
SPEAKER_02What could it hurt us? All right, so it's now a couple hours before uh daylight. Moose is are you waking everyone up?
SPEAKER_00Sure. If it's time, I will wake up. It is time. I will wake my party up. The guards. Everyone else can do what they want, but we're gonna get up and start our trek.
SPEAKER_02Ugh. It's still dark. It is still dark. Is there enough moonlight to walk by a little bit at least? There's a waning crescent moon out there, so there's some moonlight, not a ton. So waning crescent means it's up at this time of day, actually. It's it wouldn't come out until like two or three in the morning. So yes, there would be light. Did I just man has moon knowledge?
SPEAKER_03I love how we're all just taking that as fact.
SPEAKER_04Sounds great to me. I'm gonna roll with it as something in here for all to be fair.
SPEAKER_02Waxing and waning simply means wait, is it a waxing or waning? It's waning. Right.
SPEAKER_01So check this out. The moon, full moon comes up at 6 p.m. The later in the time period of the moon goes, it'll come up at 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 30. Like so if you're in the wax.
SPEAKER_02Which by the way is completely dependent on what part of the planet you're on.
SPEAKER_01It is. Look, the full moon is only three days off, no matter where you're on the planet. A full moon here is no different, like three days from now than somewhere else on the planet. It's not like it's completely opposite, right?
SPEAKER_02So it would I looked it up. So then at the end of the evening, so like two or three in the morning is when the waxing crescent moon actually comes out. Makes sense. And then that's why you can't see it in the middle of the street. Unless you're on the opposite side of the planet. No, it's just slightly off. Then it would be day. So it does have a point. But it's still the same, it's still gonna show you the same thing.
SPEAKER_04During your cycle, it's going to do the same thing. The moon is tight-locked to Earth. Correct. Right?
SPEAKER_01It's gonna be in the same phase for everybody. This makes a moon look like here. Looks like a Wayne President.
SPEAKER_00Okay. Leave your comments. I hate you guys.
SPEAKER_04If you hit content and want to see more of it. This is why we don't have fucking sponsors. A lunar astrologist.
SPEAKER_02You know what our tagline is for this podcast, right? Yeah. Things to listen to while you're cleaning your tools. Moon river podcast. So let's go with let's get up and go get up. Yeah. There we go.
SPEAKER_01I think that conversation established the get up in this. We're awake now.
SPEAKER_04This is why we can't do one-shots. Right?
SPEAKER_00So I'm just standing there wondering. Can I not understand the whole time?
SPEAKER_02Everything we've recorded today, we'll edit down to 20 minutes.
SPEAKER_00Shit, he's right. It's a moon. Keep paying attention and you'll see.
SPEAKER_02That's no moon.
SPEAKER_00That's no moon.
SPEAKER_02All right, let's carry Sally Forth, I guess. It's a dragon. Anyway, so everyone is awake and preparing. Are we sure? Sun has not risen yet. One of us. It's a clear night. There is a waning crescent moon. Which I can't stop looking at now. Where's it at in the sky? It is above you.
SPEAKER_00It's in the waning crescent position.
SPEAKER_02So there is some light, but not a lot. Lots of shadows.
SPEAKER_00How much time till dawn? Do we know? Chances.
SPEAKER_02What's that?
SPEAKER_00Till dawn. What is the time?
SPEAKER_02Hour or two. Okay. Nobody's got abacus or hourglass or anything to calculate. No. No, but when the moon gets to that point right there, I know that we're two hours from the sun should be coming up.
SPEAKER_00Glam wakes up an hour before two.
SPEAKER_02Is your character like a druid nature thief? Maybe he's just a moon autist.
SPEAKER_04He is.
SPEAKER_00He likes moon. He's going to do that.
SPEAKER_04He's not stealing money directly, he's an astrologer. How about this? Not an astronomer.
SPEAKER_01An astrologer. If you're going to go skulking about, it's best to know which nights have moons and which nights don't. That is true. That is fair.
SPEAKER_02Deepers know these things. Yep. Yeah. And have I'm a well-established skulker at this point.
SPEAKER_00So that was not a good night. I've heard that about you.
SPEAKER_04That's an important skill for a role player, is being able to retroactively justify your bullshit.
SPEAKER_05It's a good skull. So I'm highly qualified.
SPEAKER_02We're now leaving. So right before we leave, we make sure that somebody else is awake. Like stick your thing. We can't just leave them all. So they're good. But you know what?
SPEAKER_01So I just want to make sure the GM knows that we didn't just leave without waking anybody.
SPEAKER_00Everyone, we're leaving.
SPEAKER_04And I'm sorry, I don't know what sort of picture you have of this guy in your head, but mine is he's a man in a white racing suit with a white helmet on.
SPEAKER_02No, to clarify, he is not the Stig. He is Stigier. And the wagon has a stripe. Who is, I would say, your typical hunter of the time. Okay. Outdoorsy think strider-ish.
SPEAKER_03Very aragorny.
SPEAKER_02But dirtier. Alright. A little less washed. Antivacant. A little more Nordic. No.
SPEAKER_04He's the Stig's ranger cousin.
SPEAKER_02Yeah. Some say he's a mystery man in the woods. Others say that he drives a cart for a living. Oh, we just know him as the Stigir. The most interesting Stig in this game. So we start moving forward. I will lead the party. I will scout ahead of the scouts. Alright, let me get a marching order. How are we traveling? One. Hilmar is in front. Yeah. Oh, you want to go in front? That's fine too. Of course. I will skulk behind her.
SPEAKER_04Yeah, you should probably be in the back. Me and Hilmar will be in the front. That's fine.
SPEAKER_02Yeah, let's go. Okay, so.
SPEAKER_00Middle. Middle, middle. Who's bringing up the rear? He's in my backpack. Okay, Rodney's bringing up the rear.
SPEAKER_02Albin's in front of Rodney. Doc is at the front with the dwarf. Did that throw? Did I have that right?
SPEAKER_00So he can like magic. Missile off his back, right?
SPEAKER_02No. What do you mean? No. Okay. He's not really riding him.
SPEAKER_00Yeah, he is. He's my backpack.
SPEAKER_03He's a backpack him in his backpack. Deep snow. He's going to get fucking stuck. Yeah.
SPEAKER_02Yeah. Well, I got it. The halflings aren't going to make it through the path of Caradra.
SPEAKER_00We'll be slower than a caravan.
SPEAKER_02Well, uh typically I would say you would have the seawolf in front, dwarf following him, and that's going to break a path for anyone. Yeah, probably. I'm a large man. We don't have an elf to run ahead on top of the snow. The elf. Were we allowed to play elves? In this world, elves don't run on top of snow. They don't do it. If they have magic shoes, they do. Magic snow shoes. That's true. You've never seen anything like that.
SPEAKER_00I have magic snow shoes. It says right there on my shoes. Let's go.
SPEAKER_02We're fish tailing. We are fish tailing.
SPEAKER_00But that's why I'm here.
SPEAKER_02So after about a half hour. Everyone give me an intelligence check and let me have the number.
SPEAKER_00No.
SPEAKER_04Is that with her modifier? Yes. Okay. Four. Mine is a modified three. Twelve?
SPEAKER_00Modified thirteen. 14.
SPEAKER_02Okay. You continue traveling through the snow. We missed it. And no, you all the treasure shit. The halfling and the priest of nature in the middle of the pack.
SPEAKER_04Right. Just get this. Me and Helm are trading axe sharpening tooth. Yeah, you guys are off in your own little world. You're chatting away.
SPEAKER_03C-Rex.
SPEAKER_04Making noise. Not being careful. Like a 30-degree angle. You just gotta sneak 30 degrees. That's the magic part.
SPEAKER_02Serial.
SPEAKER_04Okay.
SPEAKER_02As the smallest member, you just have this feeling that you're being watched. You just feel like you would be, you're looking around, you're looking at everybody else, you're like, I'm gonna be the one they fucking target. If something attacks, I'm the meal. You guys feeling that? I think we're being watched.
SPEAKER_04You're not feeling good. I mean, he's the smallest, but he's also the least threatening.
SPEAKER_02So right, but if I'm saying a barter and I'm watching you five idiots trudge through the snow.
SPEAKER_04Oh, yeah, you gotta separate him out.
SPEAKER_02He's the easy kill, right? Yep.
SPEAKER_04That's what they're saying.
SPEAKER_02And you're feeling it right now. Did you verbally state your discomfort? Is that was that what you're well? Let's hear it. This is a podcast.
SPEAKER_01Oh my god.
SPEAKER_02Role play that shit, boy. He said it. I just wanted to make sure he said it. He did it. So you guys feel like we're being watched. You're just being paranoid.
SPEAKER_00No, I don't.
SPEAKER_02And you know, your little buddy needs a shit. Are you looking around? What are you doing?
SPEAKER_00Little buddy.
SPEAKER_02Are you just trudging along? Keep looking around there and plan to go invisible.
SPEAKER_00You should just do it now.
SPEAKER_02It's gonna disappear. You hear a go invisible. What's your charisma modifier, sir? Minus three. So you ugly as fuck. I got a five. She won't feel so bad. I don't know.
SPEAKER_03I got a six.
SPEAKER_02Nobody likes this little people. You're walking along, everybody's trudging through the darkness. And they disappear. And you're looking at the sides, and you freeze because before you, fairly near, you realize there is an enormous white and gray cat in like pre-pounce position staring at you.
SPEAKER_00I call for the kitty. Here, kitty.
SPEAKER_02And we're gonna start initiative with John as this best described as saber-toothed tiger-looking cat. Nice. Can I ride it? Leaps at the halfling. I wonder what it tastes like. More food. I want to ride it. What's your armor class there, buddy? A lot. A nine. Why don't you just throw yourself in its mouth? I can do mage armor. The smile at right now as surprise. As it leaps from its hiding place in a slight depression at the halfling.
SPEAKER_04I'm gonna have a flight depression in a minute.
SPEAKER_02There might that might be all that's left.
SPEAKER_03Do you have another character ready to go?
SPEAKER_00I got four.
SPEAKER_03Okay, good. I see you've played with Sean before.
SPEAKER_00I did say I wanted to turn invisible. Is that what all the extra characters were about?
SPEAKER_02Absolutely hits. This thing leaps. You guys pretty much just see a blur. And the halfling's dead. And there's something on the halfling. He did say he turned out. Well that he was surprised he didn't have a chance to do anything.
SPEAKER_04He disappears inside the cat. Yeah.
SPEAKER_02Same thing in its belly. You take two points of damage. I'm rolling like myself today. If that was the case, you would have missed. As this huge cat pounces on you, and it's for the rest of you, it's just there. You see a blur, and now there's this enormous duck. Yes, sir. What are your actions? What do you think? Now we roll initiative. Alright. Yeah. Let's go. I got an 11. What do we got? D20?
SPEAKER_04For me.
SPEAKER_02Just a 20? Yeah, roll a d20 plus your dex bonus. Right, plus your dex bonus. I don't want to add that. Too bad. Or your dex minus. Yeah. And a 19. Add the negative. 19? 10. Anybody beat a 19?
SPEAKER_00I got a four, five.
SPEAKER_02Okay, so we start with him and we go around the table. Yep. Like we were. Like I was going to do in the first place. Well, but now the dice have justified it. Yes. It's been blasting. Kilmar, what are you what are your actions?
SPEAKER_03I am going to chop this thing in half with a great axe. So you're going to move and attack. Yeah. Well, it's on him, so it's not we're the marching distance. It's what ten feet. Right.
SPEAKER_02Yeah, you were at in the front, so you just have to push past a few to get your attack.
SPEAKER_00This is why I should have been in your backpack.
SPEAKER_03I think it would have been a lot cooler. Be a lot of plus four. Nada. I missed. What did you roll?
SPEAKER_02Swing and a miss. That's a seven. You're right. You did miss. These things are actually easier to hit than I thought they would be, but that does not hit. That doesn't do it. So you see Hilmar lunge past you and try to hit it with his axe and he misses. All right. Drake. The halfling is in the mouth of the Smilodon, I believe you called it. The halfling is on his back on his side on the ground, and Smilodon is over him. Okay. It bit him and they're tussling.
SPEAKER_01So to me, with a the small item there on the ground being being cereal and the smilodon, I am going to pick the pocket of the smilodon and pull the halfling out from under its gaping jaws using my picking pocket skills.
SPEAKER_02The same skill I would use to pick pockets. I don't think that's how that works. Oh, come on, man. No.
SPEAKER_01He's 20 pounds.
SPEAKER_02Yeah. You put him in your pocket. Well, look, you can make a ruling on my attempt to pull him out from the jaws. You can try to pull him out. Right. That would be an attack. Okay. Using dexterity in this particular case. Just roll an attack to hit him.
SPEAKER_01To hit who? The halfling?
SPEAKER_02The halfling.
SPEAKER_01Oh, yeah. I got a one.
SPEAKER_02Go. Alright, so I rolled a 12. Alright, you have successfully grabbed the halfling and pulled him out from under the cat. You're now standing in front of the cat holding the halfling. Okay. Cool. And that would be the end of your action, so.
SPEAKER_04Alright. Alright. I am going to shout dwarven insults, and I'm going to run up and attempt to cleave the beastie with my great axe. One-handed. Do it. And that will be a modified 24. Nice. 23, sorry.
SPEAKER_03Too bad it wasn't a dragon. Yeah, you don't want that. See what the problem is? You had so many dice you couldn't choose one.
SPEAKER_04And that will do eight points of damage.
SPEAKER_02Nice. Solid. Sink the axe into the smilodon's back. It's the insults that did it. It appears to be bloodied. Nice. Well. Alright, on to uh Glem.
SPEAKER_00Glem. I'm going to attack it with my long sword.
unknownCome on.
SPEAKER_03Do it. Don't roll a one. Do it. So much pressure. You don't want to roll a one. You don't want to put the long sword out of the snow.
SPEAKER_00I roll the 13 plus one. That's a 14.
SPEAKER_02You hit it. Nice. If Clem gets both kills, I'm murder the kiddies.
SPEAKER_00Uh, one damage.
SPEAKER_02You barely hit it. It's not the one I was looking for.
SPEAKER_00I did, though.
SPEAKER_02You see hair, a tuft of hair flies as longsword passes near-ish like a bald spot in the head. Alright, so we're on to Cereal, who is currently suspended in the air, being held from behind, facing the now wounded Smilodon. All right.
SPEAKER_00Wiggle out of Drake's or Drek's grasp.
SPEAKER_02Do we need to make an opposed check or are you letting him? No, I'll totally let him go. Maybe I cast mage armor. He wants to carry a squirming halfling around. And a five or six. That'd be a six. That would fail. Is that with your bonuses added to it? Oh, okay.
SPEAKER_04So now you would mage armor. Oh, no, you didn't. Okay. No, fail to cast the spell.
SPEAKER_02We did not cast it. You can't cast mage armor. Until you sleep. So you cannot cast that spell again until you rest.
SPEAKER_00Alright, well, I'm going to sit down and take a nap.
SPEAKER_02You're going to do it right now. I'm going to knock this rest out while you're trying to. Alright, so you sit down in front of the smilodon, who is now enraged because of the wound in its back. A small target. He can attack somebody else. One, two, three, it attacks the dwarf that just wounded it. Four, five, six, it attached the or attacks the halfling that is currently sitting on the on the ground. It's turning for the dwarf. Predictable. Rolled an 11. Did it hit? I hit it too. Does it have bonuses to hit from an 11? Not if you don't have any bonuses, but doesn't. No, that one didn't hit. Second attack is a 22.
SPEAKER_00It's not hit.
SPEAKER_02Just hit it by that much. Just barely. Just a bit outside.
SPEAKER_05Just a bit outside.
SPEAKER_02You take four points of damage. Just barely killed me. Alright. Four points. That's not really true. No. That was a all right. So the Smilodon is now at bay facing the dwarf. Gomar, what are you gonna do?
SPEAKER_03I'm gonna attempt to chop him with my great axe. Yep, that's gonna be a hit. 19. Nice. Yes, that will hit. Three, four points of damage.
SPEAKER_02Alright. You hit it and do not kill it. It looks badly wounded. It is definitely in fight or flight, and it chose fight. You chose poorly. Yeah. So we're on to 18 Dreck. For three points of pokey damage with my short sword. Okay. You have killed the beast. How does it die?
SPEAKER_01As it turns to face the dwarf, it gives me its backside. I slide the sword in right under its ribcage towards its backside. Yeah, ribcage is very weapon.
SPEAKER_04Ribb cage. Okay. So you stab the beast from Bob. Next time use the word flank. Flank.
SPEAKER_02Well, I'm standing behind it, but I stab the flank. The cat slumps to the ground dead as the blood paints the snow red. And silence returns to the forest. Do we eat that cat or what? Do we decide we're not eating the cat, but now I do steal its teeth. That's right. So you're gonna take like 15, 20 minutes to detail. Well, yeah, I mean, I don't know that I'm gonna be very gentle about it, but yeah, I pack the teeth out.
SPEAKER_00I have uh odd urge to search for my sword, but it's in my hand.
SPEAKER_02All right. Thanks for sharing.
SPEAKER_04It'd make a nice handling cape the sword into the snow and then look for it. And chase it. There you go.
SPEAKER_02You could close your eyes and we'll do it for you. Can I skin it for a cape?
SPEAKER_00I want to keep the head on it too.
SPEAKER_04And then with that head on it. I mean, you could. It's a big cat. He's a little guy. You're not that big.
SPEAKER_00I'm gonna put some blocks on my feet.
SPEAKER_02This is the albino we are. He's he's here. All right. So are you actually taking the time to do that? No, I'll do it on our way back if we make it.
SPEAKER_04We're not hauling the cat for you.
SPEAKER_00No, we're gonna leave right here. We're just going up to the path and coming back.
SPEAKER_04Yes, just agree with him.
SPEAKER_00In theory, we're gonna be able to return to the caravan.
SPEAKER_04I've known this man a long time. You don't just agree with him.
SPEAKER_02We're not coming back.
SPEAKER_04The caravan's coming to us. Don't humor him. See, you see how that works? I know. I'm just saying, as a rule, I'm not just agreeing with him.
SPEAKER_02Was that ever agreed upon? I didn't agree to anything. I don't recall it ever being discussed whether they were supposed to move out and catch up to you or whether you were coming back.
SPEAKER_04It would be a general assumption that the caravan wouldn't.
SPEAKER_02If we were scouting ahead, would you be coming back? They might even head back. We're gonna do this the old-fashioned way.
SPEAKER_00They're gonna stop at the cat. The caravan's gone. They're gonna stop and pick the cat up for me.
SPEAKER_02It is still dark. It is now quiet. In the only way that a snowy night can be. Alright, Thrall and Hallmark get up there and lead us further. Next time, spot the big smiley beast. I know he's white and the snow's white, but you know. Never seen one of them before.
SPEAKER_04I'm gonna pat my scratch.
SPEAKER_02Rub some dirt on it.
SPEAKER_04Yep. Just a scratch.
SPEAKER_02It's a number of scratches.
SPEAKER_04Save your concern, lads. It's just a scratch. I don't remember. No one was concerned.
SPEAKER_02No one's fine. Don't worry about me. It's a few. I think I got some band-aids. I got a band-aid on. The more you keep saying you're fine, the less I think you are. Anyway. So you can start marching again, same marching order? Yeah. Yep. Alright. You continue up the pass, starting to get a bit steeper, taking a bit more effort. And as you walk, the sun begins to rise. Make it to the pass in about an hour. So we're like at the top. Or like at the top. You're in between the mountainside. Right. You're at the entryway to the pass. The pass is very steep-sided. At least it varies. It widens and narrows. Yeah. Well, the wagons are. The wagons can make it through here. Okay. You know, the this was the intended route, or so you believe, you've been told. The wagon should be able to make it through here in its current state, but again, it's gonna be slow. All right. We have a shovel. Well, this is where an ambush would be.
SPEAKER_01Right, that's why we're here to clear, make sure that this is good before the caravan comes by. So we can't see it from up here though, right?
SPEAKER_02Like looking back down over where we were. There's the caravan? Yeah. You can see the smoke. You can see down into the pass or down into the valley you came from, and you can see there's a tendril of smoke rising from the fire. All right. So you know where it is in relation to you. Okay.
SPEAKER_04As long as it's just one.
SPEAKER_02Well, my point was that we can't signal back. They can't see wave a torch on a pole or something. Do semaphore or anything goofy. No. Right. Nobody's got binoculars. All right. Well, let's give this area a scout. Yeah, get off the path. We gotta check the search for hiding spots where things might be ambushed.
SPEAKER_04Well, let's uh let's look at all the places where we would set the ambush from.
SPEAKER_02So the pass itself is long. This is a big mountain range. Okay. So you are at the entryway to the pass. Ah, okay. From where you are, there is still more uphill to go.
SPEAKER_04Okay.
SPEAKER_02Okay. But it's at the pass. It's less steep than where you've come from. Okay. All right. So we're getting to the top. Just looking, you probably estimate it'll take a day or two to get through the pass. Does this pass have a name? Not in particular, no. Great. I'm gonna call it the master. Wait, Smile-Don's cut. It's Miro's ear pass. It's true, yeah.
SPEAKER_04There's gotta be wolves here, then. I'm sorry, I'm being meta.
unknownYeah.
SPEAKER_04Very meta. I like Smileodon's cut better.
SPEAKER_02Well, this pass isn't gonna scout itself. Alright. Well, somebody we gotta go back and let the caravan know.
SPEAKER_01We don't know what they're doing.
SPEAKER_04So I'm assuming this is a pass. So on one side we have sheer mountain face, and on the other side we have sheer drop-off. Or do we have sheer mountain face on both sides?
SPEAKER_02You have shear mountain face on both sides. Okay. And it narrows and widens. So, you know, from where you are, you can see a fair distance in a narrow path. Okay. But it's clear from that view, there are points along the road where it widens that you can't see.
SPEAKER_04Okay.
SPEAKER_02Right. I understand. And they are in interval with the rising and falling of the peaks. Alright.
SPEAKER_04Are there any like ledges or outcrappings above the paths?
SPEAKER_02All kinds of them.
SPEAKER_03That's where we need to go.
SPEAKER_02From what you can see from where you are, there are places where the forest has taken root, like clumps of trees along the slopes. Not something you could cover in a couple days. If you tried to check everything, you could spend quite a while up here just searching through the mountain pass.
SPEAKER_04But I would say as we travel through and search through the pass, that we have eyeballs on each of these as we go under them.
SPEAKER_01Alright. Well, so so here's the way I would think a step that we could do this, right? Now, if we go out ahead of the caravan while it's in the pass, right, we scout on kind of a broader front. That way we're ahead searching both sides of the pass. We can stay ahead of the caravan, keep our eyes up for high archers ambushing or whatever. And the caravan will essentially really be unguarded, but we've already done all the heavy lifting in front.
SPEAKER_04Right.
SPEAKER_01Right?
SPEAKER_04So because we're perfect and we would not miss anything.
SPEAKER_01Of course. Well, that's the idea, right? That's why we're getting so well paid. So not that he could hear for this month-long journey.
SPEAKER_03And then we need what you're thinking.
SPEAKER_01See, perhaps. Look. I'm not quite there yet. I understand the premise. The thought had crossed my mind. Are you a thief? Yeah, I know, right? I'm uh not even a dishonest thief. It's just that I'm not quite there yet.
SPEAKER_04I think if that decision was ever made. Okay, so what you're saying is let the caravan come up to us here.
SPEAKER_03And then we'll make up our mind.
SPEAKER_04Do the same thing tomorrow morning and move out early. Well, they're gonna make it past this point, right?
SPEAKER_01So we're gonna but my point is once the caravan gets here, we then go out in front of the caravan at a set distance to search out potential ambush spots while the caravan is moving along behind us at whatever slow pace it will make.
SPEAKER_02So we stay ahead of the caravan, scouting a hundred, two hundred yards, looking for ambushers. And then that way are we gonna camp with the caravan still? Yeah, I think so, right? I mean safety and numbers and all that. I mean Or we could camp ahead and be bait. Or we could ambush the camera. Well, you're assuming there's anything out there to attempt an ambush. I like that idea. But being bait?
SPEAKER_04No, ambushing the camera. No, he's he's still five minutes ago.
SPEAKER_02Yeah, so I'm thinking I'm thinking this through.
SPEAKER_01All right, well, let's run it through the end. Hallmark.
SPEAKER_02Work for the muscle. They have no muscle. There's still eight guards in the street. Yeah, there's a lot of them. There's ten people there.
SPEAKER_04We don't know. We don't know who's in that eleven people.
SPEAKER_02All right. Well, let's keep this as an option.
SPEAKER_04It's all fun and games until the uh arch mage of the age of skill comes out.
SPEAKER_03The fire ball is cast. Let's just keep this simmering on the back burner here.
SPEAKER_02Right. I mean, we could make plans all day. I got no shortage of plans.
SPEAKER_01If we want to make plan two could be going and knocking on the door of caravan wagon number five and being like, Hello, hey, Hallibert's sucking this up. Do you want to put me in charge?
SPEAKER_02I can't get you there any faster.
SPEAKER_03Alright, so we say we wait here till the caravan shows up. We don't know take a couple hours.
SPEAKER_04Yeah, so we can just take up defensive positions, wait till the caravan gets here, and then scout ahead if there's enough day.
SPEAKER_03You don't even know if the caravan's coming this way.
SPEAKER_02At the speed that they move, it'll be noon until they get here.
SPEAKER_00If they're coming.
SPEAKER_02That too.
SPEAKER_04Well, we can have the halfling ski down to them.
SPEAKER_02There we go. Just pitch it.
SPEAKER_04I'll head back. I'll head back there and shield as a sled. Yep, slightly. There we go. Yeah, Lightwells isn't here to ride the shield as a surfboard. Clumsiest halfling ever.
SPEAKER_02Minus one dex.
SPEAKER_01Look, I think a beat. Nobody should be going back to the caravan alone based on the wildlife scenario around here.
SPEAKER_02Right. Roll two D ten.
SPEAKER_00I just had a terrible thought.
SPEAKER_02Oh, what was it? While you rolled that.
SPEAKER_00That's a six and a three. That rumbling.
SPEAKER_03What was that rumbling?
SPEAKER_00I think we're gonna find the pass is blocked.
SPEAKER_01Oh like an avalanche. I've heard of those.
SPEAKER_04Possibly intentionally.
SPEAKER_01Not that I heard any rumblings. I didn't hear any rumblings. I was asleep.
SPEAKER_00I felt the rumblings.
SPEAKER_03Oh, okay. So yeah, that's a great point. So what is we'll see. Way to give the DM ideas.
SPEAKER_00No, he already has the ideas.
SPEAKER_03No, he doesn't. I have lots of ideas.
SPEAKER_04No, he doesn't.
SPEAKER_03Just winging it. He needs us.
SPEAKER_04He got quiet when you said that.
SPEAKER_01Spring it down. It was a random sound that you heard at night, but now it's a random sound you heard at night that blocked the pass. And to be fair, I'm okay with that. Yeah. I understand that using the players shut your damn mouth against them. Absolutely. Absolutely. You got a great idea for the GM? Don't say it.
SPEAKER_00And it was caused by a dragon, too. Or a rock.
SPEAKER_03We're level two. Remember that, right? We are level two. Level two?
SPEAKER_00We'll be like three or four by the time this is over.
SPEAKER_02I mean, how much gold do you need to level up?
SPEAKER_00Don't you just level up like in GAs anyway?
SPEAKER_03I don't know how it works in this game.
SPEAKER_04No, we'd have to get 20 experience points. There's an experience to make level three. And we've gotten none so far. Well, we haven't ended a session. Well, actually, the experience points in this. So your first level is ten. So you get your ten experience points. Then your experience points reset to zero. And then for level three, you have to get twenty. Oh, interesting.
SPEAKER_01Right.
SPEAKER_02And then thirty, four. But I don't know how much you get for killing a smilodon. And at least ten. Each. One.
SPEAKER_00Is the caravan closing in on us?
unknownYeah.
SPEAKER_02If we don't see them in a little while, we'll go. I'll go back and get it.
SPEAKER_00Maybe we should start up the car.
SPEAKER_02Okay, so I have a couple questions about how you're waiting.
unknownOh.
SPEAKER_02So do we. So you've hiked up the pass, killed the smilodon. General loafing. Are you climbing up the slopes to scout? Are you looking for high ground to see? What are you doing? That's what I think would probably be a best bet. I like the way you're thinking, yeah, because then maybe I could see them and signal.
SPEAKER_01Give them the old moose signal again or whatever pre-agreed upon. They're gonna get that. A green. What is the universal color of go in Shadow Dark? Green. Green?
SPEAKER_02So does anybody got any green thing we can put on my 10-foot pole and wave around up there like hey, green, just go. Well, I would posit in an evergreen forest. Not a good color. What about red? Green may not stand out. Well, red would be of red coloring. Oh, yeah. Blunt bloody smile-on fur. That's about an hour behind you. It's true. We did meet that pretty early. All right.
SPEAKER_03Well, let's just scrap this.
SPEAKER_02So you're at the entry to the pass. You have behind you, you have the valley that opens up. I need to get a headset. I think there was another avalanche. Yeah. You see, you have the valley that opens up. You see the smoke column has trailed off. Right. Presumably because the caravan has gotten underway. And then in front of you is the pass. You can see down the pass. Which is really up because you said there was still up to go, right? Right. Down the pass, maybe just in that direction. You can see towards the summit. And there's at least two or three areas that you would assume where the pass widens that you can't see into. And then the crest.
SPEAKER_01So is there an area down here where, and by down here I mean on this end of the pass, where it looks like it could be relatively easy to climb up for someone of my caliber and look out in both directions down the pass and back in the direction we came from.
SPEAKER_02Maybe it's only like 30 or 40 feet extra up, but I mean that makes a pretty big difference. Yes. All right. So there are, I mean, there are certainly areas where you look and you're like, oh, that's probably an animal trail. Okay. All right. Yeah.
SPEAKER_01So I'm gonna take my I'm gonna take my rope, my 60 feet of rope. I don't know. I'm gonna cut it in half, right? So I have two 30-foot sections of rope. Okay. And I take that rope and I wrap it around my waist. Okay. Right? And I leave a loose like in the front, so I have my grappling hook. Essentially I have it tied around my waist, and my grappling hook will be like readily available to throw out in the event that I fall and throw something.
SPEAKER_0220, 25 feet of rope in front of you with the grappling hook on it.
SPEAKER_01Well, it'll the rope will actually be wrapped up around my waist, and the grappling hook will just be on the end of the rope. In case I fall, the grappling hook will catch it, the rope will catch me, and then I won't fall very far. It's really essentially That's a hell of a plan.
SPEAKER_02It's an essentially, I'm trying to belay myself from falling in the event that I fall down a snowy bit. It might not work, but I'm just being prepared. I'm being prepared. Looking for a way to arrest your fall. You should try feather fall. It might break your back, but you'll feather fall.
SPEAKER_01It's all good. This game doesn't deal with back damage, it just deals with hit point damage. So that's good.
SPEAKER_02I can live with hit point damage. Well, there are there are also conditions. Well, I'm not worried about those.
SPEAKER_00The broken back can be.
SPEAKER_02Like a person with a broken back probably can't make as disadvantage on strength. You're probably a shitty thief with a broken back. Yeah. The last thing you want is me playing this character sitting in the front row of the caravans with a broken back, because he'll probably compete. Boy, will he bitch around?
SPEAKER_00Kick some snow on him. Don't know what happened to him. He just walked off. He said he was done.
SPEAKER_02How do you do that? So look around.
SPEAKER_04This group we leave every man behind. That's true.
SPEAKER_02Yeah, you can scramble. How high are you wanting to go? Uh maybe 30 or 40 feet, just enough to get above the no doubt stunted trees at this altitude. Okay. And spend 15, 20 minutes scrambling around, and you achieve a vantage point. Okay. What are we looking for? I'm just looking for at this point, really, the lay of the land down the direction we want to go. Okay.
SPEAKER_01So to look for obvious signs of any kind of habitation or smoke or avalanche or whatever. And then to look behind and see if I can see the caravan coming up.
SPEAKER_02Alright. So down the pass, you see probably cloud cover. The remnants of wispy clouds that you can see in the mountains when you're at that altitude. Yeah. There's certainly some of that. Fog mixed amongst the pines. You can see that yeah, the caravan definitely moved out. Good. Yeah, the smoke trail is gone. And there's you think you see a little movement down there where the caravan's likely moving up the road. Alright. No obvious signs of habitation. Okay. But is there a sign of any kind of snowy blockages of the pass? You can't see over the crest of the pass from here. Right. It's still above you. But you don't see any blockages on this side of the crest. Okay. And while I could yell my report, I will go down. Okay. Scramble down the hill.
SPEAKER_04Hey, you guys! You guys.
SPEAKER_02Right. And then cause the avalanche by yelling. Right. So I didn't do that. Hey everybody, I'm right here. Hey, you guys. Just go up there and then we get an avalanche. Just start clapping. Really loud. Right. Bang two sticks together. Okay, it's lightning bolt. You do notice like down into the valley, you can see some birds, like large birds of prey flying around. Down in the valley we came from? Yeah. There's some down in there. That's fine. There's a couple above, like in and amongst the peaks. Man. Are these called the Rocky Mountains? No. But thanks for playing. I mean, these mountains should have a name. At this point, it's I'm guessing they're called the Rock Hills.
SPEAKER_04I don't know which one's the rim shot sound. So do it. I'll just mix it in later.
SPEAKER_02Okay. You won't.
SPEAKER_04You're right, I won't.
unknownNo. All right.
SPEAKER_02Is any while he is doing that's going to take him probably about an hour. Scramble up, look around, scramble back down. Is anyone going with him? Is anyone doing anything else?
unknownNo.
SPEAKER_02Let Johnny Appleseed do his thing, all right? Absolutely not. But you have a pretty good idea of what's ahead in the next at least day of travel to get up to the summit at this point.
SPEAKER_03How far past the summit is Miro's rest? Well, it's another nine to twelve days. Business days.
SPEAKER_02Backwards?
SPEAKER_04Business days. We're going so slow. It is the rest of your life.
SPEAKER_02From what Halvard had said. Beyond the pass, it's probably five to six days. Jesus. At this rate.
SPEAKER_00At this rate.
SPEAKER_02Somebody needs to get that man a travel intimate. That dude don't know how to fucking count. But his estimate seems to be assuming the worst from a travel condition standpoint. That would have been handy at the beginning of the journey.
SPEAKER_00It's an eight-day trip. Well, before it snows, then you're assuming it's not going to snow.
SPEAKER_04This is like totally on brand with the corporate estimations.
SPEAKER_02A three-hour tool. Alright. Anyone else that is at the pass doing anything?
SPEAKER_04I'm going to continue with my discussion with Helmore on axe sharpen sharpening techniques.
SPEAKER_03I'm learning the dwarven technique of axe sharpening.
SPEAKER_04And when I'm done, we will both have advantage on damage rolls. Nice. Nice that how that works.
SPEAKER_02It says it's once you get somewhere with the proper tools to take advantage of right here in that spot. Anything from you, Serial, or are you just sitting there bleeding a little bit? Sitting there bleeding a little bit, keeping a watch out for another uh thing trying to snackle me. Some cat PTSD. You're looking out from belt level. Gotcha.
SPEAKER_04Snackle. Oh, by the way, what healing rules are we're using with this? Healing? Yeah. There's healing?
SPEAKER_02We have a plan. Well, you can rest.
SPEAKER_04Well, yeah, we do.
SPEAKER_02And we're going to when the caravan gets here. Or there can be a big thing. If you have an eight-hour rest, yes.
SPEAKER_04Yeah.
SPEAKER_02Okay. So we're doing that. All right. Sounds good.
SPEAKER_00I'm just gonna sit and wait.
SPEAKER_02Alright. So a couple hours pass. You can start seeing the caravan coming up the road. And they're moving slow. Yeah, I think we were the cattle prod. The incline is having an effect. But they're coming. The sun's, you know, about midday at this point, you're guessing. Caravan's approaching. Probably gonna be maybe three, four miles into the pass by the time night falls. But you're plodding along. So when the caravan reaches you, are you doing anything in particular? No.
SPEAKER_00Seeing if anyone picked up my cat.
SPEAKER_02No. Bastards. They just kept going. Moved the carcass to the side of the road. They left the meat there. Yeah. Cat can't be good. What? Very lean. I mean chewy.
SPEAKER_04You're gonna sit there and bitch about moose, but you won't mix in a little cat? Well, moose, I know moose to be good. As do I. You're bitching moose again.
SPEAKER_00The cat I've had is lean and stringy.
SPEAKER_02I've personally eaten moose on many occasions. I've never eaten a cat that I'm aware of.
SPEAKER_00That you're aware of.
SPEAKER_02That you're aware of. It's not a cat. It's smile of done. All right.
SPEAKER_00So I'm gonna continue.
SPEAKER_01Yeah. We're gonna continue down the path. Take a bit of a lead. Do what I said earlier. Scout ahead 100 yards, but moving ahead of the caravan.
SPEAKER_02All of us at once. I think.
SPEAKER_00Well, are you still making food for the caravan? I don't know. Apparently not. Not today. Well, yeah, not now.
SPEAKER_02He doesn't have KP when he's not with the caravan.
SPEAKER_04I hope they didn't starve. This is a break for him. He's like I don't have to wash dishes.
SPEAKER_02Well, no, the advantage to being on KP is you're warm.
SPEAKER_00And I get to eat.
SPEAKER_02And you get first dibs on the food.
SPEAKER_00The best of the movies.
SPEAKER_02Look, I don't have any problem with keeping the priest fat and happy.
SPEAKER_00Right.
SPEAKER_01As long as he rolls. That's a good point. As long as he rolls.
SPEAKER_00What's your priest check? It's not good. It's 11. Well, that's average. All right.
SPEAKER_01So it was a figure of speech anyway, there, Clem. Don't take it personal. Just a figure of speech.
SPEAKER_02Well, this fat and happy priest is going to go ahead and so how far ahead of the caravan are you ranging? 100 to 200 yards, I would think. Okay, so not very far. No, just enough to suss out any ambushes. Alright. So as the day wears on, sun starts to set, you can see. Well, actually, prior to sunset, about the normal time you would think you would start making camp. You can see the pass widens a bit. There's a nice kind of glen there. There's a stream. Good place to camp.
SPEAKER_04Okay.
SPEAKER_02Off the trail a bit.
SPEAKER_04It's a perfect spot for an ambush.
SPEAKER_02Mm-hmm. Right? At night. If you're getting ambushed at night.
SPEAKER_04Yeah, I only the only thing, you know, would be slightly worse would be like twilight time, like right now.
SPEAKER_03Mm-hmm.
SPEAKER_04Yeah.
SPEAKER_03They would have had to wait here for a very long time. Right. I think that's the key factor dying. Dying. Yeah.
SPEAKER_01Here in the frozen tundra of the city.
SPEAKER_03I'm just gonna sit here and wait. I'm sure a wagon will be along at any time.
SPEAKER_04This is humans. Someone could know. The assumptions is but there are things that might ambush us that might be acclimatized.
SPEAKER_03Well, they were thinking we were due through here eight days ago or so. Right? So they probably would have gave up. So they gave up. Right.
SPEAKER_04See, that's a great that was the defensive tactic. That's right.
SPEAKER_00They can just watch from a distance up in the mountain.
unknownShut up.
SPEAKER_02God. So you Cyril. Are you staying ahead of the caravan while they set up or are you heading back?
SPEAKER_00Head back?
SPEAKER_02Yeah, yeah. There's no reason to like not set up camp and stuff.
SPEAKER_04I mean, I would say we would give a like a like a perimeter check. Oh, yeah. Just of anything around the site of the camp.
SPEAKER_01I'm assuming that happens every day, to be honest with you. There is a right way to guard a caravan, after all.
SPEAKER_02And that's what we're all about. You do, you can see the right way. Evidence of wildlife is prevalent. You see some what are probably deer, elk, caribou tracks. Large kitty tracks. Yeah, there's a few of those. Maybe bear tracks. Okay. Wait, it's winter. Bears be hibernating, aren't they? Anyway, polar bears. We're in the mountains. Polar bears are by the sea. You'd know that. You're a seawolf.
SPEAKER_03This is a fantasy world. Or maybe it's a bizly. Don't ruin my immersion.
SPEAKER_04Some of them are by the sea, and some of them drink couple of type of bear.
unknownThey do.
SPEAKER_03What I do though. Some of them like honey and don't wear anything.
SPEAKER_02Well, the thing about polar bears is they're very patient and persistent predators.
SPEAKER_00They will not stop.
SPEAKER_02They once they figured out that you are edible, they will hunt you for days. Halmar the polar bear. That's right.
SPEAKER_04Yeah, if you see a polar bear, you're dead.
SPEAKER_02Yeah, pretty much. Not in this game, because we'll kick it towards it.
SPEAKER_04Yeah, because we're ass kickers. That's right.
SPEAKER_02You're already eaten. What I do want to do before we set up camp completely is I want to take a look at the mountainside that we are camping by and look way up into the snowy, clear peaks to make sure that there's no snow up there that is going to fall upon us in a rumbly evening catastrophe of avalanche upon the caravan. There is a metric fuck ton of snow on the peaks of these mountains. The stream that runs through this little glen is crisp, clean, and cold, though. Just like it's coming off the glacier. But yeah, there's is there avalanche danger? Sure. There's lots of avalanche danger. It's a mountain pass in the winter with temperatures that rise and fall and snow fall. Seriously. It just happens. This is a fucking bad idea. It just has to be quiet. Halbert is a terrible caravan master. Whatever reason he has for going.
SPEAKER_04But look, just because it's a bad idea doesn't mean it won't be a good time.
SPEAKER_00Well, something in that way.
SPEAKER_02Most good times are bad ideas. Right. Most truly good times. Something's a lot. A lot, a lot. I bet you there's money in there. No, there's no money, remember. We're not a dime. The caravan makes camp. We're essentially worked. Dinner is cooked. Everyone is presented with moose stew. Moose stew. Oh, that's my favorite.
SPEAKER_00With carrots.
SPEAKER_02There are some carrots. With root vegetables. Onions. Some potatoes. Definitely onions.
SPEAKER_00Beets. Probably no cellar. Fresh sage.
SPEAKER_02Cooking is our way to take over this caravan.
unknownOh, shit.
SPEAKER_02Damn it, I'm hungry now. A little bit of spearmint, too. Put something interesting. Viking. Alright. As the sun sets, everyone settles in for dinner. The mushrooms and put it in the stew. Yeah, where are we going to find those? I'll find them. Kenny snow. I'll find them. Don't you worry. That's a great idea. Any particular actions before we move on to the watches for the night? I don't have any. All right. Then we will discuss that on the next episode of Retro Rollcast. This has been a Retro Rollcast production.
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